“I uncontrollably react sometimes and then repent later...”

Recently a client of mine who is a top executive in a multinational company shared this with me

He is smart, dependable and strategic but he struggled with emotional reactivity.

In group meetings, he often became defensive, especially when challenged or when someone expressed a different opinion than his own.

Surprisingly, his team reported having a good relationship with him individually.
He was patient and supportive in one-on-one interactions.

But something strange happened in meetings. He was a different man.

– He was reactive
– He became defensive
– He cut people off when they shared an opposite view
– He kept proving his own point

Everyone, including his boss, was confused.
His peers also detested him in meetings.

As a result:

– Ideas got snubbed, open communication suffered, Transparency declined and his team was demotivated.

During our coaching sessions, we dug deeper into his past.

Here’s what we found:

Despite his current success and financial stability, he had some deep-rooted beliefs & memories causing his reactivity.

– He grew up with severe financial hardships. His family sometimes survived on just one meal a day.

– He was thin and weak, frequently mocked by others.

This made him feel very inferior and he took an oath to prove himself through hard work and success.

We delved into self-reflection that made him aware of his BELIEF SYSTEM.

He believed:

– Those who make final decisions are highly respected

– If he is not highly regarded, he will be a failure

– Challenging his views means questioning his competence

This understanding opened up a lot for the leader.

He finally understood & REALISED:

– He’s not the same as before. His success shows he’s capable now.

– Being right all the time doesn’t define his worth.

– He doesn’t need to prove everything. Success doesn’t need the last word.

– It’s not just about him. Team ideas make us stronger.

He understood the merit of letting go of his beliefs & his subconscious pattern to constantly defend, control, and prove.

He practiced awareness and started focussing on the meeting’s purpose rather than anything else.

Emotional reactivity happens when old wounds trigger strong emotions.

KUDOS to such amazing senior leaders who are ready to be so VULNERABLE & are totally COMMITTED to change!

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So do you also find yourself emotionally reacting at times and then repenting later?

Do you remember any past experiences that may be coming in your way?

Have you found a way to understand and get over your past?

#Beliefs #Triggers #Blindspots #EmotionalReactivity #ExcutiveCoach #LeadershipCoach #ExecutiveCoaching
#LeadershipCoaching #LeadershipDevelopment #ABrighterLife

Ashwni Sharma

MD & Founder – A Brighter Life | Global Executive Coach | Psychometric Assessment Professional | Master NLP Practitioner | Inner Transformation Specialist | Self Mastery Coach

Ashwni, the Founder and MD of A Brighter Life, is dedicated to empowering leaders to enhance their effectiveness, mindfulness, and influence for joyful success. With over 27+ years of corporate experience, driven by his passion for personal transformation, Ashwni left a successful career spanning four major companies across the UK, USA, and India. Working with CXOs, Board Members, and Top Leaders globally, he combines business management skills with life transformation expertise to enable practical and applicable conversations and actions. He holds international certifications as an Executive Coach and has mastered modalities such as NLP and Hypnotherapy. Ashwni’s passion lies in fostering self-leadership as the foundation for leadership development.

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