Mastering Leadership: The Art of Giving and Receiving Feedback
Does giving feedback to your team feel like a daunting task?
Do you feel queasy when someone says that they have feedback for you?
If yes, you are not alone.
Most leaders know that giving feedback isn’t just about those annual reviews. It’s an all-year-round thing, and if it makes you a bit nervous, it’s worth taking a deep dive and mastering it once and for all.
In the world of leadership growth, I’ve found that being able to give and receive feedback is crucial to success. It’s the foundation for solid communication and continuous improvement.
I recently had a great conversation with Neha Singh on her podcast called Bridge to Leadership. We delved deep into the nuances of giving and receiving feedback, and I’ve distilled some of the key points here, for you.
Hope you find these helpful.
Feedback is a Blessing for Growth:
How you look at feedback can make a world of difference. Instead of seeing it as something negative and distasteful, you can view it as an opportunity for growth?
If yes, you will receive feedback with gratitude because it helps you uncover blind spots and you can create new actions for yourself based on what you learn.
And, when you give feedback, the aim becomes to help the other person develop, not to shame, criticize or guilt them. As the intent shifts, the way you deliver the feedback shifts too —your tone, body language, and choice of words can make all the difference in the recipient being able to receive the feedback.
Emphasize the Impact:
When giving feedback, it’s important to highlight the impact of the person’s contributions and actions. By acknowledging their efforts, you can highlight the value they bring to the collective goal, fostering a sense of purpose, accountability and motivation.
This can have a wide-reaching impact not just on the individual; but the entire team and the organization.
Even while giving constructive feedback, remember to share specific examples and how the behavior impacted the team or the organization. This helps the receiver broaden their view of the linkages of their performance/ behavior with the larger picture
Ensure Feedback is a Two-way Process:
Feedback is about having a growth conversation. Leaders who make feedback a mutually beneficial process are effective in managing the team’s performance. It’s not just about giving feedback; it’s about creating a conversation that benefits both you and the recipient.
To do this, seek feedforward first. Steer the discussion towards a future-focused perspective. Use a simple framework like Start- Stop- Continue.
What should I start doing to be more effective?
What should I stop doing or reduce?
What am I doing well that I should continue doing, or do more of?
Use the same framework to give feedforward to your team member as well.
By fostering open and reflective dialogue, feedback conversations can turn into interactive sessions, creating a dynamic exchange rather than a one-sided lecture.
Giving Specific and Actionable Feedback:
Make it a point to always give specific and actionable feedback. It’s crucial to avoid vague or general statements and instead provide clear examples.
Focusing on the practical steps and on the ‘how’ of implementing feedback is key to ensuring effective growth and development.
Once a client reached out to me for executive coaching, expressing his confusion over a piece of feedback he had received. “I’ve been told that I need to have more gravitas,” he shared “But what is gravitas? What should I improve?”
He was frustrated over the absence of clarity on how, what and where he needs to improve. Despite his efforts to find out from various sources, including Google, the understanding of what exactly he needed to do confused him.
However, since the feedback came from an important source, it prompted him to dig deeper. He sought clarification, reaching out to other colleagues for insights and perspectives.
I often advise leaders to ask targeted questions like “What should I start doing?” or “What should I stop doing?” This hack helps them quickly grasp the change they need to bring in their behavior. Vague instructions such as “build gravitas” can leave people uncertain about what specific actions to take.
Receive Feedback with a Growth Mindset:
Here’s an interesting anecdote.
During a recent coaching session, a senior leader shared an experience wherein a colleague called him and started their conversation by saying, “if you’re in the right mood, I would like to discuss something.”
In the past, he might have taken offense or overlooked such a statement, but he had been actively working on improving his listening skills. This time, he recognized the underlying implications of this loaded statement.
The leader realized that this was, in fact, valuable feedback. It illustrated that his colleague didn’t feel he was always approachable, and that there were conditions for discussing matters with him.
It also indicated that he was humble and open enough to learn from this experience!
He decided to be more conscious of the need to be consistently approachable and open to conversations, regardless of the timing or mood. This incident emphasizes the significance of living with a growth mindset and actively paying attention to such feedback cues.
“If you are paying close attention, everything is feedback.”
The Feedback-Trust Connection:
Not all feedback is equal in our mind. While it is natural to be wary of feedback from those we may not have a good rapport with, we should not dismiss it outright. It can still be valuable and revealing.
What may help here is to seek input from trusted colleagues so there is an extra layer of verification and validation for the feedback received.
Also, if you find that you are repeatedly giving the same feedback without any effect, it is time to evaluate your trust equation with your colleague. What is coming in the way of your message being received?
“It takes courage to seek feedback, empathy to give feedback and humility to accept feedback.”
I hope these insights will enable you to nurture a positive feedback culture in your team and organization.
Mastering the art of delivering constructive feedback with grace and accepting it with humility fosters not only self-awareness but also propels teams and organizations toward higher levels of success and accomplishment.
If you wish to listen to the complete 30-minute podcast that delves deep into the art of giving and receiving feedback, listen up on Spotify & Apple Podcast.
If you are seeking to master your leadership game, why not take a leap of faith and begin a LEADER-COACH partnership? Enter your details in the form below to start a conversation.
Yoshita Swarup Sharma
Founder & CEO – A Brighter Life | ICF Certified Executive and Career Coach | Leadership facilitator | NLP Practitioner| Inner Transformation Specialist
Yoshita Swarup Sharma, CEO & Co-Founder of A Brighter Life, is an internationally certified executive and career coach (PCC). For the last eleven years, she has coached several senior leaders and CXO across the variety of industries and organizations. Recently she was awarded as one of the most influential coaching leaders of India by the World HRD Congress. She’s a leadership facilitator, advanced NLP Practitioner and a specialist on personal transformation. She writes her blog from her own experiences and reflections . She brings with her 23 years of overall work experience and has previously worked as a Marketing professional in corporates like Coca-Cola, Dabur and Ranbaxy She’s also a Kathak student and co-founder of Subah, A Covid Widow support group
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